What's your weakness?

I have a weakness, and my weakness is emotional TV shows about things that entertain me; specifically, Grey’s Anatomy. [In a nutshell, it is a show following a group of MD interns on their individual journeys to become surgeons that has been running since 2005.] I justify my addiction to this television show because it is about medicine. When they perform procedures, I look up the diseases or surgeries online and read about them and try to learn. I am the epitome of what MD’s and vets hate the worst (commonly known as Dr. Google). I allow myself to believe that I am gaining knowledge instead of destroying brain cells by letting them melt away from disuse. I almost feel a sense of camaraderie with these people. I realize they are just actors, but as a child that grew up watching television I love to allow myself to get drawn in and feel like it’s real. When they deal with hardship, I sympathize. When they survive difficulties in their careers, I feel like I can survive difficulties, too. How sad is that? Pretty sad, but that’s me. I am very American in my personal expectation to be entertained, an attribute I am trying to combat.

When I watch Grey’s Anatomy, I usually cry. (Just an FYI, I’m a crier, as in, full time wimp). I am sure that this is the producer’s intention, because in each episode they manage to draw you in enough to think that you know these people, that you have some pseudo-emotions for these characters, right before they kill them off. And yet, I continue to watch. I said I’m a crybaby, never said I was a logical crybaby.

One good thing about watching a show that has to keep coming up with shocking and unusual injurious situations to put people in to keep the audience entertained is that I am afforded the opportunity to think about what I would do in a similar situation. What would I do if I was diagnosed with cancer and given a week to live? What would I do if Sean was in a car accident or fire that destroyed his face? How would I handle losing a limb? Would I want to be a vegetable for a while or be unplugged right away?

(I would want minimal medication and to be home if possible, never away from Sean, surrounded by everyone I love, including the furry ones. I would be there for Sean no matter what, every second of the way. I would mourn the loss, and then I would try to learn how to adjust. I would want to be a vegetable for as long as there was a little hope. If I’m gone gone, like 100% brain dead, then I would want to be taken off life support so Sean and everyone else could have closure, and I could meet my Savior.)

All I do know for sure is that when I do die, whoever writes my obituary better put the way I died in there. It’s my biggest pet peeve to read obituaries and have no idea how the person died. And not just a cursory “passed away from an illness” or something like that. I’m talking details, people! Details. 

Grey's Anatomy Top 5 Moments

[Edit: As far as Facebook goes, I think I would want my Facebook page to stay up, with a brief description about how I died and stuff like that on there. It's a tough subject, because I have read the Facebook pages of people who have died and it's a bit weird. I don't want people posting to me on there, messages to me. I won't get them, that's for sure! I would rather people who felt compelled to write something, write about a memory we shared or post a photo or something like that. Something to remember the good times, to celebrate life.]